Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Feeling a little over-whelmed

This has been one wild ride. This weekend was the Crystal Frolics, Emma had a wonderful time. She went on a about a million rides, ate corn dogs, watched Fireworks, and went the Parade. We ran around, and had a great time.

On the flip side, that was all around watching grandpa who is progressively getting worse, Paul and Lindy, Jim, and Mom and Dad and I took turns sitting with him because he was very agitated and restless. He would get up and pace back and forth for hours, he would just stand there, you could tell things weren't right but you couldnt quite tell what was. Hospice came in on Monday and they changed his meds up. He is more relaxed now, and sleeping better. He's still in pain but with the meds its helping.

My girlfriend Becky is going through a really hard time right now. Her little girl Maia just got over the H1N1 and now her twins are in Children's with RSV. I am sending all my thoughts and prayers her way, because she needs to know how much she is loved and supported.

I think that I am going to break it off with the guy that I am dating right now, he has a ton of drama, and has things that he needs to work out in his life and its a little to much for me right now.

Oh I guess this turned in to a blab fest but I feel better getting it all out.

Friday, July 24, 2009

The day off, but not really

So the last couple of days have been pretty rough. Grandpa is not doing very well. He's always needed someone here to watch over him, but in the last couple of days things have gotten a lot worse. He's pretty much stopped eating. Hes drank all of about a cup of water. Hes very agitated, and wants to walk around contstantly even though he says he wants to lay down. Paul and Jimmy stayed up all night long to take turns watching over him. He wants someone to be with him, and he needs those extra hands. Its to watch because, I've come to terms with the fact that he's dying and that he's really struggling right now. I dont want him to suffer any more, and I hope that he's not in a horrible amount of pain.

Emma has been a real trooper through all of this, last week when we were on vacation, she spent the majority of her time with her Uncle Jim and Grandpa because I was doing other family things. This week we have a couple of days off and instead of doing fun outside things, she's stuck at grandma's watching movies and playing by herself in the back yard because I am here sitting watch. I love my grandpa and I'd do anything for him. I am truly glad do to the watches because it gives me more time with him, and I feel blessed that I have the opportunity to help in this phase of his life where the protector and the provider needs the protection and provisions.

On a good note, Emma and I are going to go to the Crystal Frolics tonight. She wants to ride all the rides, and check on her Nana Lynn who Em says will be in the Beer tent. There should be fireworks tonight, unless the rain comes through and we get rained out, man will that bummm Emma out.

We are also going to head over to Stacy's tomorrow and going to hang with them for a little bit. Emma was a little nervous at first because she wants to Dunk Nana in the Dunk Tank, and wants to be at the Frolics agian.....I told her we'd get to see Finn and Stacy and she was cool with that!

Monday, July 20, 2009

Busy Weekend

Whew is all I can say.......So Friday Emma and I went to the Crystal Park and Rec's Movie in the Park. We watched "Monsters Inc." and had ice cream (curtosey of Cold Stone), it was great she got to play at the park for an hour before the movie and then watch the movie. Saturday we went to Chutes and Ladders which is a nice park on Hyland Park Reserve in West Bloomington. We went with Baylen and Lindy and had an awesome time. Emma didnt like the walk home very much but we made it. Yesterday I went to see Harry Potter for the second time, I took my god-son who like me loves the movies! I do have to say that I would not have even gotten in to the books though if not for Becky who bought me the first book, then borrowed me each other one so I could finish reading them.

Emma and I have been adding Maia and the girls in to our prayers at night since Maia's been sick, and we've been praying for my Cousin Sarah whos going through probably the most difficult part of her life right now. Coping with the death of a parent who was taken way to early, but is most definately an angel sitting up there watching over all of us now.

I'm having guy issues right now, the issue is that I dont know what I want to do with the situation I am in and it sucks. Oh well I guess I should I be getting back to work now, maybe I'll write some more on that piece later on tonight.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

World's Greatest Mom.....(who me)

So the other night, I asked Emma on our way home what she wanted for dinner..She said mom, I want Chicken Sticks (fingers) and I want to eat outside. Well I said sure why not, we can have some grapes too.....She started hopping around and told me that I was the greatest mom. I know that I had a huge smile on my face. I love hearing stuff like that from her, because there are just as many times when she's saying MOM thats not fair, or I always have to do that (in her poor me voice).....

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

My First Blog Entry

Well....so it seems that everyone else I know has a Blog and uses it to keep everyone (thats interested) up to date on whats going on with they're families and life. I suppose it's time that I join the group.

There seems to be a lot going on this summer. Lets see I am going to try to lay this all out...So even if no one else wants to read this, I have a nice recap of whats been going on.

okay so first..keep in mind that i know i am missing some things...Grandpa : As everyone knows, grandpa's bladder cancer is back and he also has a high probability of the cancer moving to his spleen and one of his kidneys. He was kind of running downhill, we have Hospice coming to the house a few times a week to check on him, he needs constant supervision because he has very little satima and muscle control. My uncle comes over for some of the time during the day, and my Jim has been staying home durning the day to make sure someones there too. He has been doing much better the last couple of weeks, he loves his wheelchair, and actually went out and got a pedicure and a manicure last night.

Jim : Jimmy has come home from Iraq after being there for 15 months (yuck, i think not), and is now also home from Hawaii. He is back in MN and living with my parents. He has been a total godsend being able to watch out for grandpa when my mom and dad arent home. Hes trying to find a job right now which can be pretty darn tough seeing as how hes always home. But he totally saved me this past week. I had to go to Illinois for a Funeral and I was able to leave Emma with him for those 3 days.

Emma : What to say about Emma........Well shes the love of my life. I honestly dont know what I would have done with out her. I love to open her door and just watch her at night while she sleeps (she makes the cutest little faces while she's sleeping). She got her ears pierced again this summer. She has taken swimming lessons and loved them, she would live in the swimming pool if I let her. It helps that we have a swimming pool in our complex because its nice to be able to just head there instead of packing up to go swimming. She is so excited for school, and can't wait to go. I on the other hand wish that she wasnt quite so ready. I can't believe that I have a child that is going to be starting school this fall. Where did all the time go?

Okay so I think that this is a good start, and check back as I hope to just jot my random thoughts and expressions here often.